Unsatisfied

I was meant to live in a different time. Anytime but this one. I am so completely tired of everything. There are absolutely no words to describe the disappointment I have with myself, school, my family, my friends, and overall my life. "Hatred" is such a harsh word but "unsatisfied" is so minor and "in-between" doesn't cover it. I'm empty. Thats what I am. There is nothing left in me that wants to keep on going. Nothing at all. I'm not saying that I'm planning to attempt suicide or anything because I'm not. Its not my life to take. Inside I have a torment, no matter how overused that phrase is. My soul trembles with anger, fear, sadness, but lately never happiness. It cries and its gentle sobs are so regular they have become a lullaby to me. You cant die of sadness but you can sure suffer from it. It weighs down on your shoulders so heavily your knees start to buckle and soon your on the floor. No one lends you a helping hand because no one seems to see. I see everyone around me enjoy this hell hole we call earth. But I cant seem to adapt to the normal crap and the blandness of each day. Its like eating water crackers. There is no taste. My face gives fake laughs, fake smiles, fake emotions. A facade to keep badgering questions at bay. But what can I do now. It's too late to change anything and this plain life of mine is the only one i'll get. Sadly I have to deal with it and get over it. 

Nothing left to say,

Lili AKA Smurf Burrito