Wish I were numb,
Lili AKA Smurf Burrito
Friday, March 27, 2009
Time Just Goes On and On and On
So today was different. Haha, different . . . wow. Today I attended school like usual, went to each class, slept in math, and finally wrote a 25 minute essay on how the media influences our priorities. So I scrambled to pick something for my friends birthday present, she turned 16 this month, but I couldn't find anything. I spent 2 hours, not exaggerating, looking through crap and finally settled with a Target gift card. I hate gift cards because they are lifeless, they have no sentiment. Either way thats what I gave her and it made me angry at myself. I'm sort of alone. If I couldn't find something for her, its because I don't know her as well anymore. When and how did that happen? I'm so lost when it comes to my friend's lives. Anyways, so after I ate some dinner and headed for my other friend's house. I was super excited for our reunion. . . THE TRES AMIGAS back together. We had two extra people, a girl and a boy and I didn't mind them at all. Except they had filmed all day for a project and were already "connected" and I ended up being a 5th wheel in their little get together. They appeared to be such good friends and I felt patronized by them when my comments made no sense or were ignored. I don't know maybe I'm just sensitive. Its just hard seeing time pass and go on withought me. I have friends in my school but its not the same. I hate Rancho but in many ways my friendships there were so much stronger than today. Now I'm constantly depressed and plainly alone. Well sorry for the negative post. . . again but my life hasn't exactly been happy these past few weeks or months.
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2 comments:
OHMYGOD Lili you were SO not a fifth wheel!!! It was amazing to see you! And I get what you mean about not really knowing Shea anymore... weed? really? I have no idea... But REALLY, Lili, it was GREAT to have you there! And the only common connections anyone had to anyone else was RSF and ME. You're all my very favorite people (except for Tobin...). And did I mention that you SAVED ANDREA'S LIFE! If you hadn't been there, she would have been raped or something! You're a freaking LIFESAVER! And I love my shirt soooooooo much :) I'm wearing it right now actually... But don't ever feel like a fifth wheel and don't ever feel alone. Because you'll still have me, no matter what :) I'd say to call me but mom took my phone... so i'll probably call you. We should totally hang out this weekend! I'm on Shea-withdrawl, or course, and now I think I can understand my parents' pov... a little teensy bit. OH MY GOD I might be able to SCREEN the videos entered in the Providence Latin-American Film Festival!!! I'm so FREAKING EXCITED and in absolute SHOCK! You need to come watch them with me and tell me what they mean, cause my spanish is a tad rusty... So yeah. Don't feel alone. :D
yeah lili NOT A FIFTH WHEEL. jeez.
grr emelie. its not like im a stoner....
but we love you!!! and a target giftcard is great, im a fan, no worries lol =P
WE ALL NEED TO HANG OUT
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